Haute Flash Contessa

Rants, ramblings, raves of a woman who blames everything from road rage to undercooked pork chops on a hormone imbalance.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Learn a new language: Teenspeak or Menospeak?

Cat came home from school and, mindful of feeding her a healthful snack, Contessa called out, “Grab a Mountain Dew and one of those deep-fried Twinkies.” Milk and cookies are soooo overrated. “Pull up a seat and tell Dr. Phil about your day. Oh, and me, too.”

“Pretty crunk until my BFF jacked my Dr. B to bust some waterfalling. Now she’s fremeny number one.”

Um, Dr. Phil, could you please…

“Cat’s day was awesome until her best friend forever took her soda to show off and poured the drink into her mouth without letting the can or liquid touch her lips. Now she’s your daughter’s friend-enemy.”

Gotta love that Dr. Phil.

read the rest of the column

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