Haute Flash Contessa

Rants, ramblings, raves of a woman who blames everything from road rage to undercooked pork chops on a hormone imbalance.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Who Needs Corn Bread, Anyway?

Okay, it's a given the Contessa isn't much of a cook. She tries. Homemade dinners are sooo overrated. So are dinners, for that matter. But, every now and then, the Contessa trades in her corkscrew for a spatula.

Last week she gave homemade corn bread a shot. Yummy aromas filled the kitchen and it looked delicious. Well, it looked normal, except for that brown spot that fit right under a dollop of Country Crock Shed Spread. All right, it was edible.

Not.

Contessa's cornbread tasted like cardboard and was a tad dry. Okay, cotton-in-your-mouth dry, just not as tasty.

How did The Big Guy handle his disappointment? With gentle finesse. He scooped up the leftovers and lined the bench on our deck, as a treat for the squirrels. Our yard is overrun with the little buggers. They love ears of corn so The Big Guy figured they'd chow down on my cornbread wonders. Funny little creatures. One scooped up a mound of 'meal, stuffed it in his mouth and keeled over. I thought only possums played dead.

The little critters must be hibernating, too stuffed to move. I haven't seen a single one ever since The Big Guy put out the cornbread treats. Hmm, haven't seen our outdoor cats, The Yard Rats, either.

3 Comments:

At 10:54 AM, Blogger Kristina said...

Hmmm, you've got something there, Contessa. The Contessa's Cornbread Pest-b-Gone.

 
At 11:24 AM, Blogger haute flash contessa said...

And maybe Pets-b-Gone. (Now I'll have PETA after me.)

 
At 11:37 AM, Anonymous Midlife Slices said...

2 words. Jiffy cornbread mix. O.k. that was 3 but it's a never fail cornbread and tastes darn good. I do the "pancake" recipe on the side and cook them like pancakes in a pan with melted butter. mmmm..mmm....good.

 

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